I had to sign on the dole yesterday…It’s usually not too bad, only once a month. I’m normally in and out in ten minutes….
Well I nearly died when I saw the length of the queue.
This recession is getting out of hand!
‘Feck this’ I thought. I’m gonna be dead late for work now, if that line doesn’t start moving!
Me and the girls got a few days doing security at the U2 gig.
I rang the boss, told him i was on my way .He’d go mental if he knew where I was.
Anyway, after two hours queuing, I got finally got to the hatch .
”Have you made any attempt to seek employment since your last visit?”
”Have you attended any interviews since your last visit?”
”Are you receiving any other benefits?’
”When did you last work?”
”What did you have for your breakfast?’
Jaaasus… it was like the Spanish inquisition. I was deffo gonna be late now!
I told her about Fas sending me to McDonalds last week! ‘ I’m still waiting to hear from them” I told her.
‘’When I got there the queue was out the door and round the corner. I thought they were giving out free big Macs. Turns out they were all applying for the same job as me… As a burger flipper!’’
I didn’t tell her I legged it, no point hanging round without all A’s in me leaving cert!
Anyway, I got to the o2; dead late, but just in time to see the lads getting out of their limo!
”Howya Bono” sez I ”Nice shades!”
The fecking frosty face git never even reckd me.
I got a smile from the Edge though’ , and Larry pissed himself laughing. He’s easily amused, all I said was howya. I headed down to collect my security tag and Deco filled me in on the rules.
”Ok troops ” he said (I think he used to be in the army!)Let’s get this show on the road, and remember the rules…
Stay vigilant! Man the barricades, and whatever you do…DON’T MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH BONO…. HE DOESN’T LIKE IT!!
”Some hope” sez I ”sure he never takes off them bleedin’ shades.” 🙂